My Society My Generation- Ashamed ashamed ashamed...

Its been a while since I blogged, hands are a little rusty, the grammar rusted out and the thought process eroded. My mid-life crisis taking over, though am just nineteen. I don't know as to why I am in law school, for an introvert, the satanic rituals of public speaking, socialising and networking have now become customary. Though I feel good, as I like being outside my comfort zone in the form of challenges, what I am beginning to challenge is my souls existence. And when I am exhausted enough, I take the recourse of writing my frustration out. the little friends I have don't really appreciate this I guess. but being my friend is hard enough so i guess this isn't half as bad as bearing with me when I am around them.

 Anyway enough mumbling, coming to the topic of my new post. I as a human with a big enough brain to comprehend what is happening in society have realised how our present day society is deteriorating in the name of "Acting Cool" especially when 90 percent of what we consider "cool" is from films we see, forgetting the difference between make belief and reality. As our society progresses are we really getting dumber? Is the new meaning of civilised society a new line stretched to the core of indecency, mockery, rudeness, abusive and unscrupulousness; is intentionally being rude to somebody something we consider cool? the more modern our society gets, the stronger gets the connection to our barbaric past. Every time I come across such people I say a silent prayer, not one to god, but to myself, to remind me that i have a mind of my own and a brain that functions well enough to remind me of humanity. 

Jokes are jokes, fun is fun, but we need to give today's society a marker and a rule, so that they learn how to draw a line. I feel bad that I am part of a generation that has complete disregard for friendship, elders and society, just so that they can get their five minutes of fame. well good luck to to them and even better luck to those who have to deal with them! 

   

The Three Truths of the closet

For every closet you come across, you shall come across the three truths told by the closet... 

Truth 1

When you feel cheated, lied to, hurt or used, and you don’t know who is real and who is fake, you will probably come across the first truth found on any closet. As you stare blankly at the closet sitting, locked up in your room and locked up in your world, with your tears forming a somewhat blurred image of the world around you, and where with every teardrop a lot of hope falls too, you will see a face, a face formed on the closet, this persons face will be of that one person who will be able to change everything for you, the one that will clear your vision, give you twice the hope that you have lost in your tears and someone who would hold your hand and guide you through this treacherous world from which you have locked yourself out of. It all depends on who you see, and the rule of this truth is you should never doubt that face, rather embrace it and never let go!

Truth 2

  There is no difference between you and a closet!

You keep your emotions locked inside you, just like the closet keeps your precious things locked inside it. Only a few close people should and do get to see them.

The closet may be hard and strong when it’s shut and locked, but the moment it is opened up, its vulnerabilities are exposed, just like every person may look hard and strong from the outside, there is a completely different story inside.

If you never take out what you have kept in your closet, no one will be able to appreciate it, the same way if you never show your qualities to other people no one will appreciate you.

People will use you just as they use closets, and no closet is entirely yours, there is always a little something that belongs to someone else that lies in your closet. It’s the same way for life my friend, as you don’t only belong to yourself. There is a little of everyone in you and a little of you in everyone!

Truth 3

Every time you are hurt or sad or have lost all hope. You feel like locking yourself up in a closet. But when you actually go ahead to try and do that, you realise that there isn’t enough space, light, air and other resources for you to survive, and it would also get quite lonely there.

The truth is that it applies the same way for life. If your hurt and you want to lock yourself away, you realise that you feel exhausted sad and worse. You feel like your choking on the air around you, you feel you need more light- in the form of happiness, you feel lonely and helpless.

And as you leave the door to the closet open while you sit in it, do the same for life! Be comfortable but keep the doors open to you, so that the right amount of light, air and happiness can come to you. For the power of the sun is ever lasting, just as the power of emotions and happiness are!

O Seeker of Spirituality

O the traveler of a million paces!

 searching for spirituality in a million faces!

Look into yourself if you want to see! 

The spirituality that resides within thee!

Counting thoughts to the dime!

 Believe in the existence of something more sublime!

From Israel to india thou have traversed thee! 

To look for an answer that lies within me!

For the flower doesn't ask that blooms in this vicinity!

will I bloom better in another city?

God is our creator yet we have created thee!

 In our belief he resides full and free!

The RiSe & FaLL of the SpIdEr!

The Nandi’s were a young married couple. They resided in a small house, in a small suburb called Salt Lake. With their small house they had a small car which Mr Nandi would use to go to his small office in a small firm in a small building in the hustle bustle of Calcutta.  

Lately both Mr and Mrs Nandi were having a heated conversation about the unpaid bills and how Mr Nandi’s job was taking them nowhere and the baby due in less than four months made matters worse! Mrs Nandi couldn’t work even if she wanted to at least till next year as the baby would be too young to be left alone.

It was the month of January and a moonless Friday night. The house was empty. The small dining room was silent and there was a small little spider walking around the ceiling ready to spin its web on the recently unused fan. Hoping that where the dust settles, so shall a few flies. The spider was simple, hardworking and had to face new challenges every day, with defeat and success trying to outmatch each other with every sunrise.

Slam!! The door opened with Mr and Mrs Nandi entering.  Mr Nandi sat down on the table and Mrs Nandi flipped the fans switch on and stood by it; hoping that a little fan breeze would bring the heat down. Mr Nandi tried to do the same with a glass of water. But neither could control themselves and they began arguing!

“You are never let me enjoy myself! As it is we barely go out! And when we do, you never seem to enjoy and neither do you let me enjoy! You’re just driving me insane!!”

Mr Nandi retaliated, “your no less either, one drink and u fall all over people as if you finished a bottle, if you can’t handle yourself why do you drink?”

“You and I both know that isn’t true, and besides it has nothing to do with me! It’s your insecurity; you need to deal with it! We have a child coming up, u better grow up before our child does!”

“What do you mean by that? I am trying my level best here! I work all day, try and pay the bills, still take you out once a week and you still complain! What am I supposed to do?”

“Why don’t you be of some use for once? Your stupid job never gets any bread in our house anyway! You are living off the rent and whatever my father gives you!”

“You’re really drunk! And you’re not making any sense; please just go off to sleep!”

“The truth hurts doesn’t it? And you blind yourself so that you don’t have to face the reality!”

 But while this fight was going on a lot of other things had happened in that room. The spider that had been knocked over by the sudden movement of the fan blade and now it hung dangerously on a broken strand of web praying in its own small way, so thin that the naked eye could barely catch it, the web was almost invisible, and so was the spider to Mr and Mrs Nandi!

The fight went on for another half an hour!  But a few words changed all that!

The concluding statement as we may call it came from Mrs Nandi, “I have had enough of you and your useless ideas! All you have done is caused me and my family trouble. I should never have married you! But it isn’t too late I’ll sign the divorce papers tomorrow! I am sure my parents can take much better care of me than you probably would ever be able to!”

After this statement Mr Nandi just got up and left. And soon Mrs Nandi followed, maybe realising she had said too much,

Little did they know the fate of the small spider. The moment Mr Nandi left the web broke and the spider fell straight into the glass of water.

This small spider, residing in their small house in their small dining room, plays a small insignificant role in their lives but yet taught us one of the greatest teachings of life.

The fact that there is always a thin line, a line which is not visible- yet its presence is known, a line which we shouldn’t cross, cause if the line is crossed and it breaks; there is no going back!

If only they had followed natures clues, sometimes we overlook the smallest of things but we don’t 

Is life drawn on a chalk board?

This is one of those random thoughts. To me life is like drawing an image on a chalk board.  We start with our image on the board from the begining just like our lives as a baby, we begin to form our image of our ourselves, just as the image on the board comes to life.

To create this image on the board a lot of chalk is needed, just as to create our life’s image we need to work hard and put in hours of labour and slowly yet steadily we make our image in society.

But while we make this image on the board, there are a few errors that have to be perfected, though the imperfections are removed from the image on the board, it tends to leave a mark on the board, the same way in our lives, as we make our image we realise that we come through these obstacles; and passing these obstacles takes us closer to perfection, with each obstacle leaving a mark on us.

 As the image comes close to completion on the board, so does our human image in society. But yet again just like the delicate friction of the board and the chalk, stands our image that we have built over the years, and just like the chalk image is blown away in seconds, so can our social image come falling down instantly. 

So next time you do something crazy, think before you do it, for it will take a second for someone to blow your image to ruins!  

I Hate My Parents!!

I hate my parents! I hate them for who they are. I hate them for what they did when I was a child. The held my hand when I couldn’t stand on my own, picked me up when I couldn’t walk, caught me before I could fall, and wiped my tears off every time I cried, they gave me everything I needed even before I could ask for it, they forgave me for sins that even god wouldn’t forgive me for, taught me how to write, taught me how to speak, taught me humility, humanity and humbleness. It’s been eighteen years since they brought me into their lives, for the past eighteen years of my life I have been taking them for granted. They give me unconditional love, and I give them unconditional hatred. What I said amused me but it hurt them, every mistake I made was an experience for me, for them it was another struggle. Not once did they ask me for anything, and they never will.

I hate them for the love and care that they have given me, for I do not know if I would be able to love them as much as they love me. Even if I try to love them more than anybody or anything in the world I would never be able to come close to the amount they love me for a day. Every drop of blood that flows in them has my name on it, they wouldn’t think twice to sacrifice this blood so that I could live for another minute. They may go hungry but they would never allow the food to finish in my plate. They may wear the same clothes every day just so that I could have a new pair for every other day.

But what about the future, when they begin to age, when their bodies have weathered because of the struggles they have gone through to keep me alive, when though their will and mouth still as strong as steel yet their bodies are as weak as twigs, what will happen to them then? When it will be my turn to love them like my children, to take care of their fragile bodies, to lift them up when they can’t walk, to hold their hand when the earth beneath them is uneven, to feed them when they have no teeth left, or when they cry in pain to wipe their tears off.  Will I be there, will I give them what they take for granted in me, the love that they gave me, would I have the same for them?

I love my parents and if I have no clothes to wear I would make sure you do, and if I have clothes to wear I will make sure a hundred like you will be clothed. If I have the strength I would lift you atop the Mt Everest, if I had the will I would never let you cry in pain, if I have a heart I shall name after no one but you!

See my love that I have for you! With every promise comes an ‘if’! It proves that I can never love you as much as you love me, for you never had an ‘if’ before you did anything for me, the love that you had for me was unconditional love, love so pure that religion seemed stained. But look what I have for you- before the test of time comes, I have already set forth my conditions on my love for you. This is the love that I have for you.

Love your parents unconditionally, because they did the same without anybody asking them to!              

Thirteen minutes of the day...

I believe that for thirteen minutes in a day a person is true to himself. The rest of the time he is living in a world of make belief. This game of make belief that begins at a very young age, where we play games like “chor police” or enacting our favourite super stars, little do we know that we are going to end up spending our lives in the make belief world. The better we are at it in our childhood, the better we will be when we grow up.

Though there is an existence of reality and our presence is in reality, we still create our own make belief world.  The love, affection, trust, desire and nature we show to people are often make belief. We have realized the importance of socializing and now are beginning to realize how important it is to bluff your feelings and nature, just to seem more agreeable to society, to be accepted, to be liked, to be needed and wanted, “to go with the flow” as some people call it.

We start in school when we realize that to fit into the ‘’friends’’ category we have to do some things that we may not like, though we really do not want to bully the frail looking class mate, we have to do that to be accepted in the better group of friends as we seem to believe. Here starts our make belief world.

This is followed by the college make belief world, where we portray ourselves completely in a different manner. We now have a new image, the old bully or bullied image is now replaced by a fresh new chalkboard image. This image is whatever we imagine it to be and we work towards securing that! We show our interest in debates and public speaking because we believe that will get us importance. We show our talent in music because we believe that we will be better accepted. Most people learn to play the guitar in the hope that some girl will get impressed rather than actually having to enjoy the music. We try in every way possible to get our social acceptance, in every way possible, by hook or by crook. We use the new and the unknown as an advantage, we use people’s innocence to our benefit as they don’t know who we actually are, we can create ourselves to be whoever we want.

Another parallel make belief world we create is of the lover. I am not disagreeing with the fact that we may be in love, but behind that love there is also the acceptance of many unwanted and undesired things, for example your lover may be very loud, but with the love that you have for your partner you may behave as to seem unaffected by it, when actually your blood is boiling from inside. Here again we make compromises, going for romantic movies we never liked or drinking wine that taste worse than a diet coke. We all make our partners feel special by indirectly adjusting to their needs. We keep up a smile on our face to show that we like what they are saying when in reality it would least affect us in any way. Here we play the role of a perfect lover.

And once we start working we are always playing it sophisticated, working according to the way society wants you to. We have to impress our boss, look at the business channel or the news to make ourselves feel important, own a car, big house, big parties, designer wear, because that’s what society expects you to have to be a successful man! We are expected to be charitable with our wealth even though we have worked day and night to amass such wealth, it’s not the society’s money so they don’t care, all they have is expectations.

Even though we don’t care as to how many people have died on the street when we already have sick people living in our houses with a first class ticket to god arriving any moment. We don’t really care as to how rich people are and their assets in billions on the Forbs top ten list, when we barely have enough money to pay the rent. We read about the top ten colleges in the world when we can’t afford to get into the ten worst ones, because we don’t have the calibre and neither the money. Yet we still read this information, to make conversation, to connect to society.

But amongst this entire make belief world that we live in there is those thirteen minutes in our lives that we are true to ourselves. Where we just block the outside world and be ourselves. Thirteen minutes a day we are who we are, and we do not care about what the world thinks. For everyone these thirteen minutes comes at different times. It may come to some in breaks and to some continuously. But it is destined to come, and we can neither help it nor stop it. But the truth is that we don’t mind it, and we never will, because we love it and wish every moment that this would last forever but, life just isn’t fair. We move on, waiting for the next day, where once again those thirteen minutes will give us a reason to live, to live for the days to come, no matter how tough, how happy, or how sad the situation might be. We should embrace those thirteen minutes, understand it and cherish it. For they are rare and do not last very long. Be yourself people! Be yourself! Believe in what you believe, not in what others want you to believe in!